Mourning Michael Jackson

I've spent today trying to figure out why I feel so sad about Michael Jackson's passing. Of course he was a prolific entertainer, famous around the world for his music, dancing, fashion, and artistry. But I never even met him. Yet, for some reason, his death has left me with a sorrow so deep, it's as if I've lost a family member or best friend.

But Michael Jackson WAS like a member of my family. Through his music, I shared many moments of my life with him. I can remember exactly where I was each time one of his new music videos premiered.

As I've watched the news, BET, and MTV I've heard people talk about the influence Michael had on today's entertainers. As much as I love and appreciate the Usher's, Justin Timberlake's, and Ne-Yo's of the world, only Michael could create songs like HEAL THE WORLD, BLACK & WHITE, and MAN IN THE MIRROR and take them to the top of the charts. Michael didn't just write songs about love, sex, cars, women, and partying in the club. His lyrics reflected the world we live in, and how we all have the power to change it for the better. He was an incredible man--a genius who touched the lives of people across the world. He erased racial lines, and crossed barriers of class and gender. Something that very few people have had the power to do.

The closest I ever came to the Jackson family was an interview I did with Michael's brothers, Tito & Jermaine just a few months ago. GoTV sent me on assignment to interview them for Verizon in honor of Motown's 50th anniversary and Black History Month. I was so nervous to sit down with them, but within minutes I felt as if I was chatting with my uncles. Surprisingly shy, both Jermaine and Tito were humble, open, and had such a kind & gentle energy. From what I saw of Michael, I'd like to believe he was the same way.

Looking at the lyrics of Michael's song, CHILDHOOD, I can completely relate to his life:

Have you seen my Childhood?

I’m searching for the world that I come from

‘Cause I’ve been looking around

In the lost and found of my heart…No one understands me

I grew up with a father who was an alcoholic and addict. As a child in an environment like that, you're forced to deal with adult issues and grow up much too quickly. My escape was performing--singing, dancing, acting & trying to be a perfectionist at school to compensate for the turmoil at home. I wanted to make my mom's life easier-quite a daunting task for an 8 year old. Looking back, I realize my childhood, like Michael's, was much too short.

Have you seen my Childhood?
I’m searching for that wonder in my youth
Like fantastical stories to share
But the dreams I would dare, watch me fly…Before you judge me, try hard to love me.
The painful youth I’ve had

Have you seen my Childhood….

Michael lived a life with purpose. He touched so many people in his 50 years on this earth. And now God has taken him home, because his work is done. I know his spirit lives on, and so I write this letter to him.

Dear Michael,

Although I never met you, you touched me. Your lyrics & music ushered me through my life- first love & heartbreaks, good times & bad. Your work & example inspired me to live my life with passion, to pursue art and storytelling through the written word, dance, music, and performance. You were and will always be my inspiration. You will be missed.

Love, Shannon